You So Nasty

You know that stupid list of ridiculously named sex acts that virtually no one has ever done? It includes things like the Cleveland Steamer, the Hoover, and Donkeypunch? Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. You so nasty.

So last night I came up with a couple of new ones that you'll never do. But if you do you're one gross motherfucker (uh, almost literally in one case). The discussion rambled on for some time and nearly caused Tony to kill himself on Dim's broken whiskey bottle. Maybe it was bourbon. But if you missed it, you missed it. Even trying to explain it to latecomers to the conversation created very few chuckles. Life is one big disappointment. But then again, you can always spice it up by trying this shit out...

The Flux Capacitor:
Two dudes are feeling frisky. They want to touch their dicks together, but social mores about hot dude on dude action makes them hesitant. Lucky for them there are no such rules about fucking a girl's trach hole. One guy gets his dick deep into the girl's throat via her mouth while the other guy gets his dick deep into the girl's throat via, um, her throat. When their dicks touch in her throat it's called the Flux Capacitor.

The Mammoth Cave:
This ones pretty simple. Step one: find a chick in labor. Step two: fuck her.

Good luck.

Liberation at it's Worst

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

KC and the Bunshine Sand

Last night I had the chance to hold a vinyl copy of Space Cadet, the 1981 album by KC and the Sunshine Band, at the T&A Warehouse. The album was a bit of a flop in its time, but I'd like to give it a second chance for the following reasons:

1) That's an awesome outfit KC is wearing on the back cover. A flight suit with a zipper that runs from left shoulder down to right hip? Far out, space cadet.

2) The song titles themselves make a great bad poem:

Space Cadet, redlight.

I ask myself; you keep hanging on.

Make me a star,

I don't wanna make love;

nothing sadder than a heartache.

What's wrong? Only love...

Holdin' on so long. (punctuation mine)

3) It's really difficult to tell what the name of the album is. There was some confusion at first whether this was actually a KC and the Sunshine Band album, since it just says "KC" on the cover. Turns out that it is, supposedly. Wikpedia offers some backing for this hypothesis by listing the band as KC and the Sunshine Band. It also, however, lists Harry Wayne Casey as the only performer...

But so if KC is the band name, which I think we can pretty much agree on, then what are these other two names? "Space Cadet" and "Solo Flight" are both printed on the cover, but I can only find references to the album as Space Cadet. So what the shit is this Solo Flight thing about? I think that the album isn't really a KC and the Sunshine Band album, but a Harry Wayne Casey (better known as KC) solo record.

What I really wish that I could show you is the back cover. It's fucking beautiful. Unfortunately, I don't have a copy of the album and I didn't have a camera with me last night. Rest assured that next time I visit the T&A Warehouse, I'll take my camera and get proof of Space Cadet/Solo Flight back cover beauty.

It should be noted that, while I think the album should be given a second chance, I never actually listened to it. This is all based on my enjoyment of the packaging and confusion.

Surely You Already Know

Radiohead has a new album coming out Oct 10th. You can buy an awesome discbox that includes a vinyl copy of the album. According to Pitchfork, the US cost for it will be about $80.

You can also purchase a digital download, which will cost you ? money. Apparently Radiohead completely understands what downloading's about, so you can pay them however much you want for the digital version of the album. I mean, come on, you were going to download it for free somewhere else, so why not throw these millionaires a few extra bucks for being so forthright?

Oh, yeah, it's called In Rainbows or something equally homosexual.

But you already knew all of that, didn't you? You're so web savvy. I'm proud of you.

Animal Collective Live

Animal Collective has been one of my favorite bands over the past few years. They recently stopped by KEXP in Seattle to perform "Fireworks," "Leaf House," and "Who Could Win a Rabbit." What makes them so awesome? For one, these live version of the songs are so sonically different from the official releases that if you took out the vocals I'm not sure you'd even recognize them. That's pretty bad ass to me.

Thanks to Kent for sending the link this morning.

http://www.dominorecordco.us/?page=news&artistID=219

Asshole or Genius?

That smug look on his face says, "look, bitch, I'll stick it anywhere I want. That handfarting serenade don't come for free."

And then he takes her to the absolute worst Italian eatery where she cries in the corner because for a minute there she actually thought this guy was the shit.